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Thursday, October 9, 2008

Heartbreak on the Homefront

Cory left today to head back to Afghanistan. It was a shock for us because he needs surgery on his shoulder and were expecting for his leave to be extended. We were supposed to see the surgeon who would perform the surgery today and 2 hours before he was to get on a flight, Rear D called and told him he could not stay. Even after our Dr contacted Rear D and expressed his concern for Cory's health and the need for surgery, he still had to go. This time hurts so much more than any other time I've ever had to leave him. I feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest. We had been reassured that Cory could seek the treatment he needed to fix his shoulder. And to have it come down to literally the "11th hour" was absolutely devastating for us. There is so much more to this story, so much wrong has been done.
So Cory is heading back. Both his spirit and his body are broken. The girls are holding up amazingly well. They've had their moments, but they have definitely been real troopers. Reese was laying in my arms tonight as I was rocking him back to sleep and looking around saying "Dadadada". I'm not sure if it was intentional, but it broke my heart none the less. I think he has gotten used to seeing Daddy. Everytime the door opens, he looks with such excitement only to have it turn to disappointment. As for me, I'm a wreck. This is far more traumatizing for me than any of the other times we've had to say goodbye.
So please continue to pray for us. I know that we will get it together and move forward with our lives. Staying busy and trying to keep it together until Daddy comes home for good. Its gonna be a long 9 mths. The pain is so raw right now. I pray that it subsides as time passes. I'm angry, I'm sad, I'm proud, I'm nauseous, I'm so in love with my soldier. Such is my life. An emotional rollercoaster.
*Dear Lord,
Please keep my love, as well as the other soldiers fighting in foreign lands, safe. Please call your Army of Angels from R&R and have them surround him, guarding him. Please grant him relief from the pain of his shoulder and heal his heart from the brokeness of today. I pray that you grant the surgeons he will be seeing in Afghanistan the wisdom and knowledge to know how to adequately care for his injuries. Almighty, please grant the children and I peace, calm our spirits and guard our hearts and minds while our hero is away. I pray that you guide my steps each and everyday so that I can keep my kids occupied but never let them forget where Daddy is and what he is doing. You are the Knower of all things, the Peacespeaker, the Alpha and Omega. Please place your hand on us as we continue on this journey.
In your precious and Holy name I pray.
Amen

1 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh Christian... your mom was filling us in Wednesday night at chruch. I will pray so hard for you family. God will protect him and give him strength. Please know that I am praying for yall by name everyday!!!!
Amanda Bailey